Making Mistakes

So, who on earth doesn’t make mistakes?
WHY do we make mistakes in the first place?
How do we move on from our mistakes?
Is there another way when it comes to mistakes?

What is Google saying about the word mistake?
What is the reliable English dictionary telling us?
Where does this word come from?

Google
An act of judgement that is misguided or wrong.
(1)

Concise Oxford English Dictionary
Something which is not correct; an inaccuracy.
An act of judgement that is mis-guided or wrong.
Wrongly identify someone or something as.
(2)

Macmillan Dictionary
1. something that you have not done correctly, or something you say or think that is not correct.

a. something that you say or write in a way that is not correct.
2. something you do that you later wish you had not done, because it causes a lot of problems. (3)

Collins English Dictionary
1. an error or blunder in action, opinion or judgement

2. a misconception or misunderstanding
3. misunderstand; misinterpret
4. to take (for), interpret (as), or confuse (with)
5. to choose badly or incorrectly
6. to make a mistake in action, opinion, judgement, etc. (4)

Origin of the word Mistake
Early 14 century – “to commit an offense;”

Late 14 century – “to misunderstand, misinterpret”
From a Scandinavian source such as Old Norse mistake “take in error, miscarry”
From mis– “wrongly” (see mis-(1)) + taka “take”
Related: Mistook; mistaking. (5)

Do we get all these definitions for one word?
Is this making sense to us all about the word Mistake?
Do we truly and deeply understand it now?
Are we any wiser and better informed now after reading this?

Where is the marker of what is correct and what is not?

Who actually defines when we make a mistake?
Who are we choosing to listen to and why?
Whose opinion matters to us and who do we value?

How many of us feel our heart thumping at the thought of a mistake?
How many of us feel a constriction in our heart because of a mistake?
How many of us feel our blood pressure rising when we make a mistake?

How many of us feel internal pressure at the very thought of a mistake?
How many of us are aware our chest area feels hard and tight?
How many of us notice a change in our breathing after a mistake?

How many of us tread on eggshells to avoid making a mistake?
How many of us keep thinking we are going to make a mistake?
How many of us avoid life because we are scared of making a mistake?

How many of us know that feeling when we override and it turns into a big fat ugly mistake?
How many of us can almost see ourselves making a mistake before it even happens?
How many of us always say “I knew that was going to happen” like we know the mistake before it even happens?

How many of us have got into the habit of making mistakes?
How many of us mess up with mistakes all the time and hate it?
How many of us have a life-long pattern of always making mistakes?

How many of us want to shut off from the world when we make a mistake?
How many of us go into a moment of madness just because of a mistake?
How many of us go off spinning in thoughts when we make a mistake?

How many of us are dis-honest when it comes to our mistakes?
How many of us have become mini masters at lying about our mistakes?
How many of us squirm at the thought of others finding out about our mistakes?

How many of us are scared and can’t face the world in case they know about our mistakes?
How many of us avoid eye contact because we know, they know about our mistake?
How many of us feel shame around the mistakes in our lives?

How many of us have a cover up story about our past mistakes?
How many of us brag about our great life but hide from our mistakes?
How many of us try and hide our dodgy past which was full of mistakes?

How many of us work our butt off to cover up the mistakes we made?
How many of us hate being reminded by others of our past mistakes?

How many of us are a pay check away if we make a mistake in our job?
How many of us are paranoid as a mistake in our job could mean a life?
How many of us make mistakes with money and never get over it?
How many of us have cost our company big bucks with our mistake?

How many of us make tiny mistakes but in our head they are huge?
How many of us keep repeating the ugly thoughts about our mistakes?
How many of us beat ourselves up because of our mistakes?
How many of us just can’t get over the fact we make mistakes?

How many of us have a mood drop soon as we recall a mistake?
How many of us feel sad even thinking about a mistake from our past?
How many of us feel depressed because of our mistakes?
How many of us start having nightmares because of our mistakes?

How many of us go for the munchies when we make a mistake?
How many of us just want to stuff our feelings down when we know we have made a mistake but cannot own up to it?
How many of us know how to justify when we make a mistake?

How many of us get frustrated because we keep messing up?
How many of us get so angry with others when we know it’s our mistake?
How many of us just point the finger and blame others for our mistakes?
How many of us are ok to let someone else take the hit for our mistake?
How many of us make sure we are right when we make a mistake?

How many of us are up front and transparent about our mistakes?
How many of us find it hard to own up to our mistakes?
How many of us deny to kingdom come that we made a mistake?

How many of us pace the floor to find a way out of the mistake we just made?
How many of us run for the hills after making a mistake?
How many of us avoid people when we know there is a mistake to deal with?

How many of us phone a friend to talk ourselves out of the mistake we just made?
How many of us run away from our lives in the hope the mistakes will go away?
How many of us duck and dive but never own up to our mistakes?

How many of us want to lash out at others because of mistakes?
How many of us become aggressive when it comes to our mistakes?
How many of us get super angry at others who make a mistake?
How many of us feel bitter and resentfull about other people’s mistakes?

How many of us make mistakes with relationships but say nothing?
How many of us want to fix our terrible mistakes in our relationships?
How many of us keep going backwards when it comes to mistakes?

How many of us forget something and don’t see it as a mistake?
How many of us think mistakes mean the end of our perfect life?
How many of us make crazy mistakes when we drink alcohol?
How many of us know our drug taking is a big mistake?
How many of us can say that smoking cigarettes was our worst mistake?

How many of us are deeply hurt from our past mistakes?
How many of us live in our own prison inside our heart, for making a terrible mistake?
How many of us give ourselves a life sentence, never to recover because we made some bad mistakes years ago?
How many of us write ourselves off like it’s a wasted life just because of our mistakes?

How many of us live our lives in regret because of our past mistakes?
How many of us give up on life because of one or two mistakes?
How many of us take our mistakes to our grave?

How many of us try and laugh it off but deep down our mistakes are hurting us?
How many of us are embarrassed when we think about the mistakes we have made and keep making?

How many of us just want to talk and talk about our mistakes?
How many of us just shrug it off and keep repeating those ill mistakes?
How many of us make the effort so we don’t repeat the same mistakes?
How many of us put our hands up and own up to our mistakes?
How many of us are willing to take full Responsibility for our mistakes?

WHY do we struggle to move on from our mistakes?
WHY do we keep making mistakes over and over again?
WHY do we judge others when they make mistakes?
WHY do we get the judge and jury out on us for making a mistake?
WHY do we find it hard to Accept our mistakes as mis-takes?

WHY do some of us never get over our mistakes?
WHY do we give ourselves a hard time with mistakes?
WHY do we spend years dwelling on our mistakes?
WHY do we spend years in regret because of our mistakes?

WHY do we find it easy to allow our kids to make mistakes?
WHY do we have understanding when our children make a mistake?

What if mistakes are a way for us to learn?

What if there was another way to see our mistakes?

What if mistakes can be corrected with new choices?
In other words, a Take 2 on anything that is not Truth?

What if a mis-take can be corrected with a re-take?

ill choice = mis-take

new choice = re-take

repeated new choices = another way

consistent new choices = a new imprint going forward

living a life of new choices = erasing the past mistakes

What if we can learn from our mistakes by making new choices going forward?
Example – late night, more late nights, wake up feeling awefull.
Sleeping aids, trying this and that – nothing working.
Alcohol, eating late, partying and social media = poor sleep quality.

New choices = asking Questions WHY
WHY alcohol is needed in the first place?
WHY are we on social media every night and all day long?
WHY can’t we say NO to the party binge weekend?
WHY are we eating so late at night when our belly hurts?

Could it be possible our lifestyle choices are a mistake?
Could it be possible we can make a new choice?
Could it be possible we can make more new choices?

Could it be possible this new way of living can erase our past mistakes?

What if we have a different perspective if we do make a mistake?

What if our attitude changes towards self and others when it comes to making mistakes?

What if we could nominate our mis-takes first?

What if we had the tools to not bash and beat ourselves up every time we made a mistake?

What if there is no room for self-bashing if we re-imprint with new choices?

What if there is no space for nonsense thoughts about how bad we are because of our mistakes, as we have replaced our life with Responsibility?
In other words, take Responsibility by admitting we made a mistake.

What if a life of Responsibility stamps out the hard time we give ourselves when we do make a mistake?

What if something inside us shifts the moment we admit we made a mistake?

What if we can feel the tension release just by saying we made a mistake?

What if our blood pressure and stress levels go down, just because we have nominated our mistake?

What if we could accept that we have made mistakes and it is time to learn?

What if we gave ourselves the true compassion we do for our children, when we make a mistake?

What if mistakes are the way we humans learn?
What if learning from our mistakes is evolving us?
What if we can move on from our old mistakes?
What if we can choose again and ensure we do not walk the road of irresponsibility?

What if our past mistakes can be erased by the way we choose to live now?
In other words, making a commitment to life in all areas to take Responsibility for all our choices.

Dear World

What if mistakes are a way for us to learn?
What if there was another way that works? 

Could it be that Simple?

References

(1) (n.d). Google. Retrieved July 20, 2017 from
https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=mistakes+meaning&oq=mistakes&aqs=chrome.3.69i57j0l5.5513j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

(2) Concise Oxford English Dictionary – Twelfth Edition. Oxford University Press. 2011

(3) (n.d). Macmillan Dictionary. Retrieved July 20, 2017 from
http://www.macmillandictionary.com/dictionary/british/mistake_1

(4) (n.d). Collins English Dictionary. Retrieved July 20, 2017 from
https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/mistake

(5) (n.d). Online Etymology Dictionary. Retrieved July 20, 2017 from
http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=mistake

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Comments 34

  1. I have learned so much from all the mistakes I have made in my life. I know that making mistakes is the best way to learn. Yet after 66 years of making mistakes, I sometimes still react like I have done something wrong.

    When I was learning to walk, I made many “mistakes” yet I did not judge myself. So when did I start to feel that making mistakes was bad?

    It was when I started to feel that I had to do what other people wanted. And if I could not do what they wanted, I started to believe I had done something wrong.

    In order to do this I had to ignore what myself was telling me was true.

    So when I feel I have done something wrong is that me remembering the moment that I gave on myself to do what another person wanted?

    Is it possible that that is the only thing I have ever done that is truly wrong?

    1. Your last sentence brings tears to my eyes Ken because I can feel that the biggest mis-take I have made (and repeated), which has brought me the most harm has been just that; ‘giving up on myself to do what others wanted’.

  2. “I can choose again” – wow, that’s huge.

    It shifts the focus entirely to how we are going to move forward with the learning.

  3. What life-changing thought: that we can re-write our past choices with our choices from this point.

    Once you’ve considered that, it’s hard to be mad at yourself or indulge in shame or guilt or whatever. The only thing is ‘what’s next?’ and ‘can I be consistent with that?’.

  4. Focusing on our mistakes can be a great way to avoid listening to the message that the “mistake” is presenting to us.

    Mistakes can be an opportunity to stop and ask why did this happen?
    Understanding that everything happens for a reason, can help us go deeper, and not get caught up in the idea that mistakes are bad.

    This concept can help us look at what is happening in the world and not just react to all the increasing levels of illness, disease and violence in the world.

    What is happening in our world is a huge message that something is not working. It is time to wake up, take responsibility for the world we have created, get together and ask real questions about what is going on.

    That is what this website is all about. Thank you Simple Living Global for presenting another way to be in the world.

    This way has turned my life around. I am now inspired to do what ever is needed of me, to support humanity to return to the amazingness that we all are.

  5. There is nothing in this world that has squashed me and kept me down as effectively as the consistent berating, denigrating, self bashing I have done over what I perceived as “mistakes” or there being something wrong with me…

    Simple Living Global most definitely has shown me another way to be and live.

    Because I am stuck with me for better or worse, learning to be a supportive and compassionate friend to myself instead of the abusive one has turned my life around.

    Simple Living Global helped me see ‘mistakes’ as simply mis-takes and opportunities to recognize a behavior or pattern I do not like (do not want to keep as part of my life) and has empowered me to simply do a re-take.

    I can now say, from experience, that this is true responsibility and it is transformative.

    If mistakes are part of our education as human beings – isn’t it important to get honest about how we perceive and handle these never ending lessons?

    My old way destroyed me on a regular basis and this new way rebuilds me in the way I choose to go forward; this is evolution.

  6. I used to beat myself up big time for making mistakes and reading your ‘how many of us’ list could tick a fair few.

    In recent years I have been choosing to take responsibility for my choices, to build a loving relationship with, and foundation for, myself and with this accept myself for who I truly am. In doing this the self bashing has stopped, I am now able to see my mistakes as a point of learning and that I have a choice to erase the past by re imprinting with new choices, this allows me to stay with the joy I feel and not make a big thing out of my mistakes or let them take over my life.

  7. I used to beat myself up so much when I made a mistake, it was my default behaviour, there was no other option.

    All the things the author described would be what I’d experience –

    Spinning with negative thoughts
    Avoiding people
    Wanting to run and hide from the world
    Bashing myself for years after a mistake

    but recently I’ve noticed that the negativity is not as intense or sometimes is not even there.

    So what has changed?

    There’s been a shift in my attitude towards myself. Instead of feeling like a bad person I now accept myself more and really appreciate who I am and the beauty that I bring to the world and others.

    I also know that I am not perfect and that I will make mistakes. By accepting all of this and feeling it within me, my default position is now a sense of understanding and acceptance when I make a mistake rather than a bashing. I actually feel it physically in my body where my heart opens up and relaxes whereas before it used to jump and go crazy at the thought of even making a mistake.

    With this I am so much more understanding and accepting of others when they make a mistake. As I am not bashing myself, I am not bashing them either. This makes me much easier to be around.

  8. This blog makes the profound point that life is full of ‘lessons’ and how we handle them is what matters.

    Berating one’s self is a night and day difference from simply taking note of a choice that is not what we want, learning from it so we can go forward in responsibility.

    I used to replay my ‘mistakes’ compulsively (some haunted me for years), especially the ones which brought on embarrassing moments for me, seemingly just to make myself feel bad…

    I had little understanding of why I did things I did not like or why I would torture myself with it thereafter let alone how to go forward differently; instead of learning I was crushing myself…

    Simple Living Global – Back to Basics supported me to learn from ‘mistakes’ by simply putting my understanding hat on (self-compassion) and making a new choice; this melts my self blame and is entirely self empowering; this alone has changed my life.

  9. Great and much needed conversation about mistakes.

    Its interesting how we can for the most part feel heavy and be hard on ourselves when we make a so called mistake – but what if there is no such thing as a mistake? And only a learning as you say a learning. How else can we learn unless we try and test things, and we realise we could things another way.

    I know a wise mentor who once pulled me up as I was in the doldrums about making a mistake and feeling I was in the wrong. She said that I was making myself a victim of it and using it to bash myself – when all I needed to do was ‘cut myself some slack’, observe/reflect on what had happened, feel my part in it (where was I responsible) and then have another go. Since then I have had a go at so many things some of which I know could have been different or better but I try not to look at them as right or wrong or mistakes. After all – if I have never experienced something and I give it a go and I realise that I could do it differently next time – how else would I learn? given I had never experienced it in the first place how could I be hard on myself for something I had to learn by experiencing?

  10. I love how this blog brings the clarity of how making mistakes is our way to learn, so we don’t have to live in the wake of our choices for months, years or lifetimes, but see them for just that.. a moment of learning, then make different choices that evolve us from this, during which cancel out the previous ones.

    It takes the stress and angst out of making decisions/choices as there are always many more to make.. and learn from, whether they are mistakes or not.

  11. I spent many years beating myself up when I made mistakes. I ended up in a cycle of repeating them and IGNORING the fact all I needed to do was move on and ACCEPT that it happened. Fast forward to present day and the author of this blog has really helped me to understand that by taking RESPONSIBILTY for my choices and making a COMMITMENT to LIFE my pattern of repeating the same MISTAKES grinds to a halt.

    I see mistakes not as burden anymore but it shows me when something is OFF and gives me the space to deal with it rather than beat myself up. We are human and making mistakes is all part of our learning.

    Who I was 6 years ago is not who I am today and that really makes me APPRECIATE how far I have come. If we put the base ball bat down just for a minute would the world not Feel a better place.

  12. I made what seemed to me a bit of a whopper of a mistake recently, in an area of life I had not experienced so didn’t handle it as well as felt I could. When I realised what had happened I felt a little flat afterwards but then saw it for the learning it offered me and got over it.. and sure enough soon after another opportunity was there from a different direction for me to have another go. How profoundly simple this was when I took responsibility for my part in what took place, saw it for what it was and let it go.. it turned out not to be such a whopper after all. Sure beats giving myself a hard time and letting it affect how I am and my life from then onwards, which is what I used to do.

  13. Who doesn’t make mistakes and who doesn’t give themselves a hard time?
    I know as a kid it would bother me so much that I could not let go and had zero understanding of why or how I could erase that.

    As an adult, I made some big mistakes with money and lived in so much regret that I could not get over it for over a decade. Once I got a clear and thorough understanding from a wise man called Serge Benhayon, things started to slowly change.

    Living a life of True Consistency is a life of True Responsibility. So those words stayed stuck to my fridge door for about 4 years and then it became my normal.

    I done the formula in this blog about re-take and the new choices business and that was it. Today I claim that I live a life that is very consistent when it comes to taking Responsibility and that includes all areas of my life and not just money. No perfection ever needed and forever a student learning and learning.

    I cannot erase my ugly past mistakes but I sure can re-imprint the new choices and simply stamp out what did happen. It feels deeply empowering and it holds a quality that is hard to put into words. What I can say is that not a single moment is now lived in regret about what happened as how I live today is totally the opposite and living irresponsibly is just not on my radar and never will be. That means the end of regret.

    1. To not live with regret feels like a huge energetic millstone that we so easily carry around with us has been removed. What is left.. a lightness, acceptance and the ability to move on.. evolve.

  14. When we live a life afraid of making a mistake, it totally limits our experiences in life.

    If we are afraid of making a mistake we are totally in our head.
    Our bodies have a natural ability, that knows what it can do and not do. It loves to be on the edge, where it is learning all the time. Just watch a young child learning to walk.

    Being at this edge in all that we do, almost forces us to be in our bodies. Forces us to be present. If we start thinking, outside of what we are doing, it almost guarantees we will be fearful because we are not with ourselves.

    Simple Living Global’s Back to Basics program has supported me to stay with myself in all that I do. This has lowered my stress levels, reduced my body tension, allowed me to have better focus in my life. It has turned my life around. I am now committed to whatever is asked of me to support humanity, understanding that when I am with myself I can not make a mistake.

  15. Yesterday my 6 year old lost a bag of food shopping he was carrying. I asked him ‘what would you say to me if I had done this?’. He paused and said “I would ask you ‘what is the lesson?’.

    It seems to me kids have a natural wisdom about ‘mis-takes’. Perhaps we all have it and just need to tune back into what we have forgotten.

  16. I like how you bring the Why Questions into making new choices. Asking myself why gives me a deeper understanding of why I made the mistake, I can see where I have made similar choices that have led to mistakes.. see the likening thread running through them so I don’t need to repeat them over and over. I then can make different ones.. ones that support me. I love the simplicity of it.

  17. Even with all the illness, disease, war, and unease in the world, we are just continuing doing what we have been doing, not considering that maybe we have made a mistake.

    When a young child is growing up, it is constantly re-evaluating what is happening in its life. If it is not working it will naturally do something different untill it finds something that works. It is not afraid of making mistakes.

    So how much suffering will it take to for the human race to do something different? Why are we so afraid of change?

    With support from Simple Living Global, I have dealt with many of my issues in life that I feel have limited my ability to move on in my life. I now am open to do what ever it takes, make as many mistakes I have to, to support humanity to get back on track.

  18. If we are not making mistakes then we are not evolving.
    Just staying in our comfort zone. Afraid to live life.

    Being afraid of making mistakes can be a way of avoiding taking responsibility for our lives. An excuse. And it actually is very boring.
    The key is to find your own edge in life. To be open to things that evolve you but not pushing beyond what you are able to deal with lovingly.
    When you can stay at this edge, life is amazing.

    So be like a young child, go for it, because mistakes are not wrong, just messages that guide us in life.

  19. Top blog Simple Living Global and I specifically like this line – “What if our past mistakes can be erased by the way we choose to live now?”

    This is a great way of looking at our so called mistakes of the past as it gives us permission to move forward and to not beat ourselves up.

    I’m sure every one of us has made mistakes in their lives, I know I have, but are they really ‘mistakes’?

    Is it possible that a mistake isn’t a mistake if we learn from it and don’t do it again?

    Is it possible that a mistake isn’t a mistake if we don’t beat ourselves up with it and allow it to hold us back?

    We are all on a journey of learning and there will be times when we make the wrong choice.

    The way we deal with those wrong choices will determine whether they are mistakes or not.

  20. What does it take to admit that we have made a mistake, and realize it is time to stop and truly ask what is going on?

    The first time l tasted beer l spit it out, it tasted awful, my body knew it was poison. Yet eventually l ignored the message and starting drinking beer and even convinced myself l liked it.

    It took 30 years to finally get it, that alcohol was slowly killing me.

    Humans are considered the most intelligent species on earth. (A good question to ponder on is who came up with this fact?)
    And we continue to believe this even with all the crazy things we do to our bodies and the earth.

    The human race is basically in huge denial of the fact that something is wrong with the way we are living. This website is exposing this fact.

    We are able to live so dishonestly because we have numbed ourselves with all the distractions in the world, so we do not have to feel what is really going on.

    It is time to stop and ask ourselves is this the world we want?
    Why have we allowed our world to get to the point where our true quality of life is rapidly declining, and we are ignoring that fact?

    Simple Living Global is not only exposing all this rot, it is presenting a way of living that can support us to come up answers to these problems, a way to access a level of intelligence that humans have always had but have chosen to forget.

    It has worked for me. I am committed to living this way and I have much more awareness of what is going on in the world and feel the responsibility l have to do whatever l can to get us back on track.

  21. Yes Tim, it makes so much sense to treat mistakes as just a learning.

    It has taken me a while to get past the belief that mistakes are bad. Understanding that it is ridiculous to think you could live life perfectly, was helpful.

    And observing a young child when it is growing up, it has no concept of mistakes until someone judges.

    When we feel judged it totally limits our ability to experience life objectively. We start to develop doubt in ourselves.

    When we think we made a mistake, we are giving our power away. Do other people really know what is true for me?

  22. I sometimes break things and I feel bad.

    When I heard a mis-takes presentation by Serge Benhayon, I realised it wasn’t at all that bad. In fact, it was quite good, because mis-takes show what there is to learn.

  23. My youngest recently explained that he would like to learn to read by making his own mistakes.

    He says he doesn’t like being ‘corrected all the time at school’ because it feels bad and stops him figuring it out by himself.

    He then read a sentence, mixed up the ‘b’ with the ‘d’ and fell about laughing because his mistake was really funny and helped him learn which is the ‘b’ and which is the ‘d’, without any input and with a whole heap of joy.

  24. Mistakes are okay to make, something I would never admitted a few years ago. If I made a mistake in the past I would spend many a night lying awake worrying about it. Fast forward to present day, when I do make a mistake I look at why it happened, learn from it and move forward.

    Society does not give you permission to make mistakes as we are often judged when we do. What I do know is making mistakes is all part of growing and it does not have to consume you. A great blog!

  25. What is it about us that hates making mistakes and Why have we become masters at focusing on those mistakes, more than all the great things we have done?
    It is like appreciation is not even on our radar.

    As adults we tend to beat ourselves up consistently and have constant dialogues in our head about our mistakes and do our best to not mess up again and when we do, we repeat giving ourselves a hard time.

    I recently was leading a team and there were just so many lessons to learn and making mistakes had to be part of that learning. We all messed up and ugly as it was coming out the other end, I realise how much wiser I am today and doing my best to not go back on old ground and dig it up, but move on with the wisdom in my backpack.

    I wonder if our kids were raised with the understanding and truth that this blog is presenting, would they grow up as adults not fearing, avoiding or thinking mistakes were a big deal?

    It is high time we brought this type of learning into education, as it would be a game changer for us humans who have these ingrained habits like never getting over our mistakes and torturing ourselves in our heads for what we have done wrong.
    It really retards us and serves no one.

  26. We can feel devastated when we make mistakes, but what if, as this blog suggests mistakes are there for us to learn?

    That is most certainly a different approach.

    What if without mistakes we would never be able to grow?

    Could making mistakes be an important and inevitable part of life that none of us can avoid?

    If so, this really takes the pressure off trying to be perfect!

  27. I don’t like making mistakes because I find it hard and want to be good at things.

    The other day, I did something bad and I went to find my ‘understanding hat’. That helps me understand and not blame myself.

    I couldn’t find it, but I did feel better after looking for it.

    I only remember my understanding hat sometimes.

  28. Yesterday in the car, I was explaining to my kids that I had left my phone on charge at home so I couldn’t message Daddy. I hadn’t thought I would need my phone.

    My eldest son said ‘learn the lesson’.

    The lesson was ‘feel don’t think’.

    ‘Just learn the lesson’ – what great advice that is.

  29. Thank you for this outstanding blog.

    The question that the author poses – “what if mistakes are a way for us to learn?” – has struck me very forcibly.

    I have spent so much time over the years beating myself up for mistakes, big and small. In the past, I rarely gave myself a break if I made a mistake. For many years, I had clearly forgotten that the only way I learnt to do anything as a child, including walking, talking and reading, was through a pursuing a virtuous cycle of attempts, mistakes and re-attempts.

    I ask myself now, “why did I beat myself up so much for making mistakes?” There are a number of reasons, but the revelation I’ve just had in response to this question is startling to me: I chose to beat myself up because I did not want to take Responsibility.

    Eventually, sooner or later, after making a mistake, I would have to take Responsibility and so I would make a new choice of thought, speech or behaviour.
    But, all too frequently, the resistance to taking Responsibility for a particular event was so great that I chose to spend hours, days, and even years, telling myself I was stupid rather than make a choice to accept what had happened and look for the lesson.

    I can see that I could have saved myself from so much misery over the years if I had been more willing to take immediate Responsibility for my mistakes but, all too often, I chose beating myself up and self-abuse instead. That doesn’t make sense. But I did it. A lot.

  30. When we take Responsibility for our mistakes everything always feels alot clearer.

    When I make mistakes now, I own it, ponder on what I have learned and then move forward.
    This is big for me as I spent most of my life trying to be the perfect person that making mistakes was a big no no.

    A great blog to re-visit!

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