What are we up to in our conversations?
What kind of conversations are we having?
What are the type of topics we tend to discuss?
What is the quality of our conversations these days?
What conversations are we having at the dinner table?
Are we into the Online conversations in chat rooms?
Are we into conversations on Social Media platforms?
Are we busy babbling on about the transport delays?
Are we avoiding something and talk about the weather?
Are we coming with a hidden agenda in conversations?
Are we craving attention when it comes to conversations?
Are we trying to impress others in every conversation?
Are we very talkative in conversations, but we do it because we are shy and think others will notice how nervous we are?
Are we able to get Real and come out of our uncomfortable-ness and Speak Up in our conversations?
Are we good at hiding and delaying things as we have this habit of not expressing in conversations?
Are we always playing the silent one in all kinds of situations when it comes to conversations?
Are we anywhere near ready to strike up a proper meaning-full conversation with another on public transport?
Are we equipped to open our mouth and make sense of a situation and share it with others openly?
Are we ready to speak out and have conversations in our community about what is really going on?
Are we always fear-full about this and that when it comes to having any kind of conversation?
Are we into Hot Talk conversations and that means Empty words and no real Action?
What if Real Talk was on the agenda from now on?
What if we ALL started with a double dose of Honesty and had a REAL conversation?
What if we started talking about what is really going on?
What if we went to websites like Simple Living Global and shared what is being presented at our next conversation?
Where would our world be today if we ALL started having real and meaning-full conversations, instead of the chitta chatta that is purpose-less and leaves us feeling even more empty and separated from one another?
What if we engage fully in a conversation with one or many others and leave feeling ENRICHED and expanded inside?
It is high time that we all remove our guards, open up our Hearts fully and get talking – even with strangers.
How else are we going to see Real Change, if we are not even bothering to be Honest and open in our everyday conversations?
AND finally – these blogs are worth reading
Walk the Talk
Talking to a young man in the community who was a nurse and has now changed his career to hairdressing.
Most of us would say that false eyelashes and grooming is part of the look for the job.
We know about the pressures we have to look a certain way and it means more to us than anything else.
But what happens when overnight our hair starts falling out and there are patches on the perfectly trimmed to precision beard we are growing? Now what and what next?
Anxiety at this point does not cut it, as it just seems to add to the stress factor and most of us know stress will not support hair growth in any way.
I find it interesting how I get talking and the conversations lead to something more meaning-full. In other words, they have an element of purpose and are not just words circulating about this and that and going nowhere. Purpose to me is about evolution and that means we are not stuck in the same place, going around and around.
What I got to find out at the next conversation when sharing that I had spoken to a friend with a similar issue of hair loss, is that we need to look at this in a bigger context. In other words, not isolate it and get fixated on getting hair growth but what is the body communicating to us. In other words, having a different approach, a different angle or take, so to speak.
In my usual style, where I do not mince my words or say something just to be liked, I talk about how his life may be out of balance. Has he considered this and how I know he loves and give 100% to his job, but is that ‘giving his All’ in other areas?
I talked about cooking for himself and cleaning and doing his laundry with the same focus, care and attention to detail that he openly gives in his job and is committed to.
Aha – we have a lightbulb moment. He tells me he never cooks. Full stop.
Without any judgement or criticism – can we perhaps consider that an imbalance in how we are choosing to live our life may have an impact on our health, and in this case it is showing as hair loss? Possible?
Of course a trichologist or a medical expert may disagree. But what if we have a go at the common sense stuff first, before we trot to the hair specialist that will fix the problem, as their job is to find the solution to hair loss and with such advanced technology and products they get results.
What if that internal shift – the move to change our lifestyle choices to a more caring approach towards ourself and our body, can have deep and lasting benefits?
As a woman approaching 60 with super healthy hair and a lot of it, I feel qualified to talk about how the changes I made towards my own self care, which made my hair quality even more amazing than it was. Yes I colour it – properly at the hairdressers, as I don’t like the grey look but nevertheless, I have great hair and my job is to share what I can sense is real and feels true. That to me is purpose – making sure others evolve out of whatever they are in because they now have the awareness, thanks to me opening my mouth and having a real conversation.
I was sitting in a car early morning and watching the local greengrocer gently place some vegetables and then go to the back of his shop behind closed doors and then appear again with more veg. He was doing this with the utmost care, attention to detail and I just felt like he was nurturing everything that was in his hands.
It prompted me to go in and buy a few things and all around I just felt the order, cleanliness and deep care. I have been there a few times and had noticed how great it was as it sells a lot of different things and yet there seems to be a lot of space in the shop, because it is so well organised.
I got talking to the owner and just said how I was watching him from the car and how his approach was so gentle with the winter squash and other vegetables he was displaying. His response was he always gives it his best. He then opens up and tells me there are 4 people who run the business and they are all family. Prior to that his father run it and his grandfather opened the shop over 40 years ago. He asked me what I do and what does my husband do and he is of course referring to our jobs.
I went to pay and met his frosty sister – it’s a word I use when they are cold and unapproachable and no amount of engaging will shift the cold ice off the front. Well the owner goes past me with a broom and is sweeping the front pathways as the shop spills out onto the street. He stops me and asks me what I do and what does my husband do?
He then stops me as I was about to leave the shop and says can he have my website details as he would be interested in reading some articles. I gave him the card and it was clear he was about to say more and so I just put my bag down and let him speak. He said he never ever tells anyone but he wants to tell me about an illness he has and how he manages it every day. I had a question – what does he worry about and he said it was his teenage children. Interesting, this man has a chronic disease that is progressive and yet that was not his priority or concern – it was his kids. We could say most of us operate in this way too.
I then mentioned video gaming as I just sensed that this may be his worry and bingo he was stunned as that was exactly it and his words “they are addicted”.
Whether he visits the website or makes contact, I know beyond doubt he felt met and that someone out there (call it a customer) just listened to him.
How many of us bother to even stop and talk to a so-called stranger in the street or a man in the shop because we have a time thing going on or we are way too busy with our own life to ever stop and give our ears, so the other person can just express whatever they need to in that moment?
And finally, are we really strangers or are we all inter-connected because we are one human family?
We seem to forget the I, me, myself and my own kind when there are natural disasters, but unless those earthly corrections happen, we go around as individuals with no time for another who may just need our support and it could be simple as listening or saying what we feel in that situation, in that moment and that may be all that is needed. Not responding in something that has presented itself as it did in this case today, for me feels like a dis-service to humanity. This man represents a lot of people suffering in silence and not knowing how to express what they are feeling.
What if this type of “everyday conversation” is what makes the difference and cuts the hot talk or the empty words that we all hate but continue to do?
Talking to a taxi driver today sharing that he was part of a big security team as a driver for a Prince in the Middle East.
He said that he realised that monetary wealth cannot buy you health. A personal wealth talked about was $38 billion but yet no amount of money could cure his back problems and he had difficulty walking without an aid.
The driver said that something is not right when we have so much protection, anything money can buy in this world, the best medics in the world at their disposal but no answers to why his body had given up. He said he died but he is left with lots of questions as he heard it was a helicopter crash and news reports state there was no given cause for the crash, but that it did happen.
We then talked about the corruption that he says is worldwide and he made reference to his homeland – Afghanistan. His take was that the greed and wanting control over the masses, like it is some form of power is destroying humankind. He said we have all these different religions and yet none of us unite, all we do is bring division and separate but we are one human family.
These types of conversations seem to happen when I am with what we call strangers on one-off encounters. Doubt I would ever see this man again but yet he left me with something and that was we as a world have so much to say and we go about our daily life, not really sharing or expressing how and what we feel. We carry this kind of stuff inside our bodies and rarely, if ever find the opportunity to talk. This guy felt safe and it was clear he had not talked about this before. We carry these guarded secrets because of fear of anyone hearing what we are sensing and feeling. We are robbed of these moments that could bring about some form of acceptance, healing or resolution as its been said and no longer sitting inside our minds with no avenue to come out.
REAL CONVERSATIONS of this kind would benefit all of us, but first we need to value them and recognise the importance when we are open, with no agenda and just say whatever comes up to say. Not once did I prompt this guy or even ask him about who or what he is about. All I asked was how was he feeling and how has his day been thus far.
Incredibly enriching, when we become a real listener – like a door opens for the talker and they feel they will be heard.