It is that time of year and we may just nod and agree with one or more of the following:
Demand that we make this the Perfect Christmas ever.
Find ways to top last year like getting a multi-bird on the table. (1)
Loosen our belts and munch away as that’s what everyone does.
Forget that we have a body that does not recognise a date in the calendar.
Try something new like eating 6 times because it’s the day to do that.
Eat out and pay big bucks on Christmas Day because we can.
Stuffing more food in our mouths than at any other time of the year.
Fit in another chocolate or candy cane because there is heaps to get through.
Make sure we got the heartburn pills in the cupboard.
Consume even more alcohol because it is the season to be jolly.
Make sure we indulge in anything we want because we can.
Permission to shop and keep shopping for more and more.
Must find time to make sure we get into party mode even if we don’t want to.
Gather around and try and be something we are not.
Subscribe to be ‘happy and merry’ as our Christmas cards told us.
Playing nice when we are feeling quite angry inside.
Make out we are interested in the homeless and those who have less.
Stop being real and honest as this is not the time for that.
Wearing a mask because you lost your Passport to Get Real.
Adjust our mood according to what we want and need.
Queue up for 2 hours to get inside the supermarket.
Spend another 2 hours in line for the checkout.
Add more excitement and do more shopping on line.
Sit on the motorway for 8 hours travelling with a car load of gifts.
Get caught up in Frenzied Friday just before the big day.
Lost the Plot but it doesn’t matter as it’s Christmas.
Tell ourselves that we will change suddenly when we wake up in New Year.
Thinking about the post Christmas Sales.
Planning the New Year binge to continue the excess trend.
Don’t watch the news as it may just say something we don’t want to know.
Become highly irresponsible with our choices as no one notices at this time of year.
Consent to go overboard with anything and everything.
Act super careless because it’s the norm for happy holidays.
Winging it where we can, as we want to impress others.
Don’t let our lemonade lifestyle stop us buying champagne.
Hide the deep anxiousness we feel because the plastic cards are maxed up.
Ignore the war inside us with extreme behaviour.
Make our priority going ‘over the top’ in excess mode.
Make others our priority and forget about us as that feels selfish.
Allow others to take care of us because we can’t be bothered to make any effort.
Feel resentful because we give give and there is no one giving back to us.
Write Christmas cards to people we never communicate with all year.
Ignore the fact that our faith does not celebrate Christmas.
Pretend that everything is ok and make lying look normal.
Find time to gossip and judge about this and that.
Bored with the rellies (relatives) as it brings up our buried hurts.
Spend time with our new phone and gadgets as family chit chat is boring us.
Stick the TV on because we don’t really want to communicate with others.
Forgot something and spend the whole day stressing.
Blame our bad choices on Christmas.
Dear World
What is this blog presenting to us?
Can we relate to anything that is being said?
Is any of it making any sense?
Are we ready to be honest about Christmas?
How are we choosing to live because of a date in the calendar?
How is our body feeling with the effects of Christmas?
How is our health and well-being with all that Christmas brings?
WHY do we not feel so great once Christmas is over?
WHY are some of us depressed before and after Christmas?
WHY is there such a hype every Christmas?
WHY do we strive to buy more, do more and eat more at Christmas?
WHY are stress levels super high at Christmas?
WHY do we get anxious about cooking at Christmas?
Could it be possible Christmas is adding more ill to our body?
Could it be possible we like being irresponsible with our choices at this time because it suits us?
Could it be possible we are comfortable with Christmas because we can hide our issues?
Could it be possible that Christmas allows us to indulge and live our dreams and fantasies?
Could it be possible that Christmas means time off work, over spend, eat and keep eating, drink copious amounts of alcohol, sleep in and basically live with zero Responsibility?
Could it be possible that we love the high that Christmas brings, but loathe the denseness we feel in our body from the daily choices we make the rest of the year?
Could it be possible we have set ourselves up to subscribe to the happy holiday season as it distracts us away from the everyday Back to Basics, Simple Living lifestyle that truly works to support us to take more RESPONSIBILITY?
Is it time to get honest about what is and what is not working for us in our lives?
References
(1) Fletcher, E., & Saunderson, E. (2007, December 16). It Serves 125, Takes Eight Hours to Cook and is Stuffed with 12 Different Birds … Now That Really IS a Christmas Dinner. Retrieved December 25, 2016
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-502605/It-serves-125-takes-hours-cook-stuffed-12-different-birds—really-IS-Christmas-dinner.html
Comments 49
Christmas can be such a stressful time of year which is then masked by lots of food eating and drinking of alcohol.
So many of us end up doing things and going to places over this holiday period, that if we were honest with ourselves, we really do not want to do. Christmas is a time where we may feel the added pressure to conform and if we don’t, then we may be viewed as the odd one out.
I like what this blog says here in ‘Forget that we have a body that does not recognise a date in the calendar’. Our body likes to be cared for and listened to and not silenced by excess food and doing things that we don’t truly want to do.
Why do we go to town making harming our body the ultimate goal at Christmas time and then spend January trying to find a way to be healthy to then give up, trash our body for another 300 + days of the year, to then max it up again the next Christmas and so the cycle continues.
Would it support us more to live in the same caring way, day in and day out regardless of the date on the calender? Would our whole health and well-being benefit from this consistent approach?
This ‘odd one out’ business that you mention Shevon is a big thing for many. Try telling others that you don’t want to subscribe to the christmas stuff and they think you are weird, miserable or boring but what if what you are saying makes sense.
What if deep down we can feel that this bopping along and conforming and harming our body even more than the rest of the year because its christmas time, is hurting us in some way but we can’t see a way out. Or we don’t feel strong enough to express how we truly feel because of the fear of being judged, attacked or sticking out as the odd one.
If our body could communicate to us, have we considered what it would say after all that excess of everything during the happy holiday christmas season.
Well said Simple Living Global – this article packs a punch – a much needed wake up call of this annual occurence. The points you make offer a pause – e.g. “Make out we are interested in the homeless and those who have less.” They are great questions to take stock of what is going on, what is the intention behind the things that are done at this time of year, and, for me I am left with the question – “what does Christmas do for our world?” Given the state of our world today, illness and disease, societal ills, economic factors one might ask why have Christmas in the way it is today? Not only does it not make sense when you lay things out in this article, it leaves me wondering – does it not add to our ills?
Love it Jane – “a much needed wake up call of this annual occurence.”
So if we dig deep with what you are saying about our ‘intention behind the things that are done at this time of year’ it opens us up to many possibilities. First we need to be honest about our intentions and this will give us a clue of what is going on just beneath the surface. A classic example is giving presents because that is what we do but how many of us go over the top, max out the plastic or just spend because we want to see another person recognise and identify us when they open ‘our’ present? In other words we want to feel good or acknowledged. Something to ponder on here..
Next – it is time for the world to ask this question you are saying “what does Christmas do for our world?” If we don’t know where to start we could say the world is made up of all of us individuals. So what does Christmas do for us, what does it give us and our family and friends and our community and country?
As a nation are we better off in any way because of the Christmas business that goes on every year? Who benefits, who actually gains and if they do how much Truth is in that?
Are we ready to go there as individuals of as a world or is this way too much?
I saw a headline today from Childline that said 1,000 children had phoned Childline on Christmas day due to abuse from alcohol on that day. Does Christmas really make sense when this is the upshot of it?
This is serious stuff and great it has made it as a news headline – thank you for reporting on this Jane.
Question is what do we as individuals do about this news at Christmas time?
So we all know the harmfull affects of alcohol and this confirms that something is seriously wrong in our society. Most of us go out of our way to make sure children are given what they want ‘because its Christmas’ yet the raw truth is, this is going on. Children are reaching out to Childline because of abuse from alcohol. The truth is this is not really the figure as there are many who we will never know about suffering.
What about ALL the kids who will not ever dare phone Childline?
Where is their voice and how on earth can we reach them?
What about all those who just accept and think this is normal as they grew up with abuse?
Why is this not all over social media and getting the hits that we need to make the public wake up and at least start discussions so things do not escalate or get brushed under the carpet so to speak?
Why are we quick to jump on the bandwagon with all due respect for a child dying of terminal cancer who receives over a quarter million cards and gifts but do nothing to speak up on behalf of these children and others with equal suffering?
Do we champion, get behind a ra ra campaign and ‘do our bit’ where it suits us?
In other words where we are not challenged or asked to be responsible?
Something here for us to consider.
Yes Simple Living Global – ‘what about all the kids who will not ever dare phone Childline? Where is their voice? and the questions you pose above are for us to consider deeply. With most stats, and headlines we only touch the surface of the issue. We know the media only report ‘newsworthy’ things, and dont report the all, and that stats, and research reports can be skewed or only a tiny pocket of the bigger picture. Id love to call a meeting for instance of all Children on the planet and ask them how they see the world through their eyes… candidly and honestly as they would.
So many important questions raised here.
If we take the courage to ask, as Simple Living Global does here, why we pour so much care towards children dying of cancer, while there are so many children dealing with abuse due to alcohol who are totally un-supported then we start to feel how irresponsible we have all been in going along with the acceptance of alcohol as a ‘normal’ part of life…
What I feel is that anything we have been using to dull our own hurts and find comfort is off limits to the honesty factor… so its worth asking “what do I go-along-with, use or do to check out, ‘be normal & accepted”, find comfort or dull my pain? …and is it sustainable or really working for us all and is it working for the children of the world?”.
I’m with you Jo. There is a lot we don’t want to look at. I noticed this year the usual charity pleas on TV to help those in need in other countries. They sure do need help. But 2 things came up for me:
(1) Why are the TV pleas designed to maximise the pull on the heartstrings of emotion? Would it not be enough to lay out the facts without the violins playing? Would we not respond as well without the guilt of knowing there are people suffering while we indulge at Xmas? Or would we feel less good about ourselves after if there were no emotional highs/lows?
(2) Why aren’t we seeing adverts about our biggest killers and the evil in our own homes: smoking, alcohol and other drugs, obesity, abuse? Do we not want to go there? Would it be too uncomfortable? Would we switch off the TV? Is it easier to look out before we look in?
I love your questions, Jo: what do I go along with to appear ‘normal’ and what do I use to stay in comfort? They work on a societal as well an individual level. And what is society if it is not a construct of all our individual choices?
So true Shevon. When I told people this year that we were using the day off to clear out our loft, it was met with confusion and dismissiveness. ‘What about the children?’ was a stock response. What about them, I say.
Interesting what is said about doing things because we feel we should, without reflecting on what we actually want or what is right for us. I recognise I have bought into the ‘it’s a time for friends and family’ thing and the energy of it is strong. We’re breaking through, but there is more to go.
Maybe being the odd one out is actually something to be celebrated. It didn’t bother Pythagoras when he proposed the earth to be be spherical. Maybe we should see odd ones out more as trail blazing and appreciate them and ourselves for it.
Good point JS because as it turns out Pythagoras was correct and the world is spherical not flat as was previously believed. Therefore being the odd one’s out, for example, by not following the crowd and doing what the masses are doing, because we are being honest about what feels true for us, could actually be paving the way for the future. Rather than judging what we see as weird or boring, we could actually appreciate and learn from these ‘odd one’s out.’
Thank you JS and Shevon for your contribution here. Well the author wrote this blog on Christmas day morning and had no agenda of how it would turn out or what would be said. All that was needed was to make sure it was another day – same same ‘business as usual’ as they say.
Changing or altering our internal state because of a date in the calendar is saying something. It is like we give ourself this invisible licence, permission so to speak, to let loose and not get concerned if we lose the plot.
We forget all about that word RESPONSIBILITY and then wonder why we feel this and that post Christmas.
Could it be that the odd ones are actually presenting another way?
Could it be possible that these odd ones are living the future now?
Possible?
On the thread of ‘the odd ones’ in society who may just be presenting something valuable:
I want to say that it is not about being harsh or judging of societal standards, it IS about looking at what we like to ‘think’ is ‘good’ that may not, in truth, be so ‘good’; it is about feeling just under the pretty surface for what is really going on in anything that does not leave us feeling the wonder-fullness of who we are…
We have a world society deeply enmeshed in issues and problems; this equates to a huge amount of suffering in people all around the Earth.
It seems to me that ‘the odd ones’ who don’t partake of the cocktail at the party, who don’t eat all the same foods as the crowd and who are willing to speak up about uncomfortable topics may just be showing us that it is:
In our power to get honest enough to feel which things we do that are not actually working to bring or cultivate real connection in a family or in a lonely world.
In our power to bring more true care to a quite careless world.
In our power not to go along with things that feel wrong, disadvantage or harm others or make us sick.
In our power to bring meaning into a world that has lost so much of its true meaning from words to religion to holidays.
In our power to change the tide of alcohol associated abuse across the globe.
…So a great big thank you to all the ‘ugly ducklings’ out there who are bringing out the magic of who we all truly are for a world that does not always accept you but does, in my opinion, need you.
Many people know that something doesn’t make sense about Christmas. Something else that caught my eye in the news today was that it costs a family on average £800 for Christmas which includes money being spent on food and drink, as well as cards and decorations. And that nearly a quarter of people in the UK feel under pressure to spend more than they can afford. Christmas feels like one big ‘runaway train’ that even though we can see it and feel it – we are not dealing with it, or making a choice to say ‘no’ so the train keeps on running. Conversations like this bring back the reality to the situation. I would love to do a survey (and maybe somebody already has) of how people felt – before, during and after Christmas.
In a world society so loaded with issues, imbalances and hardship it just makes sense to take a look into or at least consider the different choices being made by individuals who are ‘not playing ball’ with the norms that keep it all so unhappily rolling around and around…
I know that since I began listening to my body more and making choices based on what I feel is loving and true instead of constantly trying to ‘do the right thing’, make others happy or keep up a level of comfort (not rock to boat) my life has made a lot more sense to me. With this more truthful way of living I am more steady and have a sense of fulfillment I never felt before; so for me, Christmas does not even come close to offering what I have now, every day.
Thank you again for your contribution here Jane Keep. What is interesting is 25% of the UK population are feeling ‘under pressure to spend more than they can afford’ at Christmas. So what is this all about?
Who is putting the pressure on?
WHY are we allowing ourselves as intelligent adults to be under pressure?
WHY are we choosing this pressure year in and year out?
WHY are we accepting the stress of debt every christmas and putting up with it.
Is this about ‘keeping up with the jones’ as they say?
In other words you can’t let others know you don’t want to overspend as that would make you stick out and be talked about.
What anxiety would that bring to those who are paying out and then to know it is on cards, decorations, food and drink and that in itself says a lot.
What happens to our decorations?
Do we throw them out as they are not fashionable the next year or go with our decor or colour scheme?
Have we lost the plot?
Are we really pleasing the kids with our fancy decorations?
Do our guests going ‘wow wow’ make it worth spending all that money we don’t have?
Does anyone actually care what decorations we have or not have?
How long does the buzz of the festive decorations last – really?
Are we just trying harder each year to top the year before as thats what others do?
WHY are we subscribing to something that is not responsible?
How long can we keep up this irresponsible way of living?
When I was little Christmas was very simple; sometimes there was no money at all for ‘shopping’ beyond basic essentials so mom and dad made us special things out of wood. Later there was a bit more money but what I felt was that the more presents we got the less love I felt in them and in the whole day, like it was more about ‘making up for something more important that they felt was missing’…
When I observe other families and friends ‘doing Christmas’ I usually feel some of this ‘guilt giving’ as well as the use of Christmas as an ‘escape’ from the rest of the year.
In this I feel very little true connection, meaning or care.
What I see and feel now is a simple, though socially challenging, answer to all of this.
If we address our very human issue of feeling disconnected or feeling hurt from the lack of quality in our connection with our selves and one another than we will not need to exist on the empty trappings (and financial complications) of consumerism or other solutions which do not address the underlying cause of our un-rest.
Thank you for your comment Jo and what sticks out is “if we address our very human issue of feeling disconnected..”
Talking from lived experience, this lack of connection creates a gap, a void within us and instead of finding a true way to connect to our inner most we seek outer stuff to fill the void and of course it simply does not cut it. No matter what you give it, feed it or offer it nothing is ever enough and it feels like a bottomless pit. Our focus remains on the outer and the expense of the inner being. Here lies a clue why things are not so great on our planet.
I agree Jo and Simple Living Global. When we feel empty, void of ourselves, when we dont take care of ourselves, our body, and honour and cherish ourselves, we are easily led into the distractions and busyness of so called ‘life’ as they fill up our time, leave us no head space, and they seemingly and momentarily at best fill up the void we feel inside. I know when I was younger I rushed around from one thing to the next, jumped both feet into every celebration, party, Christmas etc and did it all to the max, I worked hard, studied hard, and my life was a series of tasks and actions that were endless – leaving no space for me to breath, sit, rest, sleep or take stock. I did this on purpose – so as to avoid stopping and feeling, as when I did, and in the few moments I paused I felt anxious, panic, empty, sad, overwhelmed, and exhausted. It felt then easier to stay on the ‘merry-go-round’ of a busy life rather than find a rhythm of my own, one where as I stopped the ‘runaway train’ way of life I was living I would need to take account of the deeper rooted hurts and issues I was facing. Christmas is one of those times that offers a huge distraction, false ‘joy’, and ‘time out’ – yet while this is going on, look deep into our eyes, the underlying panic, tiredness, emptiness, exhaustion is there just beneath the surface.
Great comment Jane about how we choose to fill up our time and talking from your own lived experience. When we write from real life it holds value as others feel it. You make sense when you say if you did stop, the ugly stuff would come up so to avoid that you keep going in busy busy mode.
So it is a choice in every moment but it seems that when we make ugly choices then it almost sets us up to do the same again and off we go on this momentum, what you call the ‘runaway train’ and at no point do we stop unless something major happens.
This Christmas distraction stuff is getting worse as we the consumer demand more and more and the suppliers provide so the gap to basic real life, grounded earthy every day life is not valued or even considered as it offers no “entertainment factor” for our mind.
Could it be possible that the mind wants fantasy dream like moments as it feels light and this helps to not feel the denseness that is felt in our body?
The good deeds we do in the name of benevolence.
Is this doing good for us in anyway? In other words do we do it because it makes us feel better or we get some form of recognition, identification from doing the charitable thing every year?
So our conscience at Christmas time in particular says ‘lets rally round and do our bit’ but what about the rest of the year?
Are the elders in our community enjoying retirement by offering wisdom to our youth consistently?
Are we committed to being open and honest with our neighbours?
Are we bothering to check in and just connect with others in our community?
Are we interested in having a meaningful conversation on the bus or train during our daily commute?
Are we concerned about the high suicide rates and no one has the answers?
Are we ‘in the know’ about the drug world?
Are we tuned in to the neighbours who have domestic violence as their ‘normal’?
Are we aware of what is happening on the streets?
Are we turning a blind eye most of the time because it suits us?
Are we comfortable not knowing all this ‘negative news’ as we are ok?
Are the above questions what true good is really about?
Thank you for sharing this comment Jane Keep as it is very serious.
Most of the time we don’t see or want to see the repercussions of any harmful behaviour. Christmas has become a time where we give ourselves permission to get drunker than drunk and behave in the most reckless ways, but as your comment confirms our children are being affected and they know that it’s abuse otherwise they would not be calling Childline.
What then happens to those children, year after year as they grow into adults?
How are they further affected by this?
Do they then continue the cycle?
The harms of alcohol are now well reported in the press including the extortionate amount alcohol use is costing health services.
Many measures are being proposed as a way to deter people from drinking lots of alcohol including price increases, but to be honest I know that a price increase in anything has never stopped me from doing something harmful like when I used to smoke cigarettes. Until we understand why we’re doing something and feel the harming effects whatever our choice of drug will be whether it’s alcohol, TV, Sport, chocolate, illicit substances, etc we’ll keep finding a way to have it.
Good point Shevon about how we give ourselves ‘permission’ to have crazy behaviour at Christmas like getting even more drunk and reckless as you say.
Price reductions and all the other campaigns to stop the culture of drinking alcohol is not working and our blog on this website – the real truth about Alcohol confirms this. As you say Shevon, we need to understand WHY we are doing something that harms us. This could be chocolate, porn, gambling, social media, shopping or any drug of our choice.
We also need to ask what is going on in our life that makes us want to do things that harm our precious body.
It took 50 Christmases for me to realize I could do something different at Christmas and it would be ok.
So many choices I have made in my life were made around doing the right thing. If I had truly checked in with myself and trusted what I felt I would have done many things differently in my life.
Looking back I understand that I was not taking real responsibility for my choices. It was easy to just do what everybody else was doing rather then honoring myself and what I felt.
I am stopping and making more conscious choices now and not only will that change my life, it will make a difference in the world because my choices affect everything.
A very valuable and wise comment Ken Elmer. Thank You.
Doing the right thing – how many of us could say ‘ditto’ here?
On reflection we could have done things differently. How many of us could agree?
It is easy do do what everybody else was doing.
WHY do we go for the ‘easy’ option most of the time?
WHY do we not want to be different and honour what we truly feel?
WHY are we so afraid and who are we afraid of?
Our choices will make a difference in the world because Our choices affect everything.
That sentence alone speaks volumes.
Another observation about Christmas – I have been walking around my local neighbourhood these last few days and on street corners there are now large piles of Christmas Trees ready to be collected by the local council. Its great that the local council provide this service, and that people are taking their trees to the collection point. However, it strikes me as a waste of resource in the end – so we have Christmas coming, we go and shop for a tree to put in our house for two weeks (or so), then we take it out and put it on the street corner for it to be disposed of. I did wonder how much this costs? All for one day? One thing I did see was that Kew Gardens in London asked for Christmas Trees to be taken to their gate on a certain date – so that they could reuse the trees as mulch for the gardens.
Interesting observation here Jane Keep about Christmas trees and the bigger picture.
What makes no sense is we are banging on about the resources on our precious planet and yet it seems to be when it suits us. We are not consistent in our campaigns and government plans about saving the planet. WHY?
Why do we champion and get behind a project but only to a point?
Why do we want change but only where it suits us and our lifestyle?
WHY do we have different sets of rules at different times?
How many of us bother to even think what happens to that tree once the baubles and lights are off?
What happens to last years tinsel and lights?
How many of us are dumping all our unwanted gifts in the loft, garage, cupboards and at the goodwill charity shops?
How many of us are finding the christmas stuff getting more and more crazy every year?
WHY are we all just subscribing because the back lash is simply not worth it?
I grew up with Christmas being a celebrated event with family. I didn’t understand why we even celebrated it, but the family got caught in the hype of it all and I went along with it. Over the years I observed it change it no longer was about family, it was more about how we can out do each other, who got the best presents, who had the biggest turkey and so forth.
Who is really responsible for making this period a mad frenzy celebratory event?
I too observed the shops going silly, media hyping the event, supermarkets overstocked with food and the alcohol consumption increase. Its as if a spell is being casted upon us all and then we wake up after gluttony, overspent, probably broke and gloomy as we were carried away with this ‘season of being jolly!’
Recently I observed a family member crazy with buying presents for her family, no doubt thousands of dollars were spent for this one day.
I’ve been observing people at work buy me Christmas presents for the sake of buying presents with no thought nor consideration of what I loved. When I asked them to not buy me presents, they finally realised the truth behind my reasons, I am then called ‘hard to buy for’ or ‘fussy’, yet I hadn’t asked for anything or expected anything from them.
Is it necessary? Could the love, gratitude and appreciation of each other not be felt with out presents, spending spree or indulgence of alcohol and food – all year round? Are we not enough?
What is it about this time of year that sends most of us into frantic mode?
We spend hours stressing over what to buy for our families and friends.
We buy things for people we hardly know or don’t even like.
We feel obliged to send cards to people we haven’t seen for years just because they send us a card.
We spend a fortune on food and drink for one day on family we probably don’t see for a year or don’t want to see because it brings up too much of our past hurts.
We go into £100’s or £1,000’s of debt for one day and then spend the whole of next year paying it back only to start the cycle all over again next Christmas.
There is so much about this day that makes no sense at all – so why do we play along with it?
Is it because we don’t want to stand out?
Is it because we want to be accepted by society?
Is it because we actually need the attention ourselves?
Is it because we need the indulgence in the food and alcohol?
Is it because we feel we deserve a break from our daily lives?
Is it because it is the only accepted time of year when we can indulge and not be criticised?
The way Christmas is celebrated these days is so far removed from its original intent with the excesses of this period being made more important.
Isn’t it time to get real and honest about our reasons for ‘celebrating’ this time of year?
Today I caught the tail end of a news story of the rise in dogs being smuggled into the UK for Christmas.
What is it about Christmas that the world goes into a frenzy and into excesses of everything?
Christmas seems to be a time where our lack of morals and irresponsibility is hightened and further exposed in ALL areas of life. Something surely is not right here.
I for one won’t be partaking in the frenzy as I see no point. The world is in a mess with people struggling just to get through daily life. I choose to spend the Christmas period focused on what I know is needed for humanity, that can raise our awareness of what is really going on in the world rather than indulge in wasteful behaviour that we then spends months trying to clean up.
A total waste of time.
I was talking to a woman who sings in a Nursing Home and she said she done a Christmas song last weekend and it did not go down well with the elderly. We got talking about this and read that xmas music does affect our mental health.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/christmas-music-can-harm-mental-health-cause-stress-psychologist-finds/
What if it reminds these people of past bad memories?
What if it feels like a band aid of being happy when deep down they are very unhappy?
What if the same tunes repeated year in and year out get boring?
What if the words are empty and hold no purpose of meaning?
What if the sound is a vibration that they no longer want to be a part of?
What if people are deeply miserable and a happy jolly festive song is like a red rag?
What if it brings on stress as the music is a reminder – its getting to the end of the year?
What if the wishing away in all the lyrics is not making any difference in real life?
What if music does have a profound affect on our body and that we are simply not aware of this because we don’t want to?
What if these elderly in our community are giving us an insight into something that may be worth exploring further?
Christmas 2017 –
We now have apps to help us choose Christmas trees.
So that we don’t have to leave the comfort of our own home and deal with the trauma of getting a Christmas tree and lugging it home, there are companies where Christmas trees can be bought via an app. Customers can then have them home delivered.
The niche is in the fact that buyers can scan a room in their home to identify the best spot for the tree. The screen can then be pinched to adjust the size of the tree so that the buyer gets the correct one.
I remember the many years of putting up Christmas trees when I was growing up and the stress my Mum was in when the old fake tree had to be thrown out and ‘real’ trees were bought and the mess afterwards.
I do wonder what all of this fuss is about now regarding Christmas trees and why we need them.
Where has this desire for Christmas trees come from and what use is it to have this tree in our homes for a few weeks every year?
Does it serve any purpose?
At the supermarket checkout there are these baubles in pearly colour that look very fancy.
One was a bubble bath with Prosecco – the latest buzz word wine that seems to be in anything and everything. This was a cream pearl colour and the green pearly colour was Gin and Tonic. My first thought was – what next?
The long list of chemicals on the back put me off and I wonder what is the feeling or whatever we are supposed to get by using this in our bath. Forget the skin and what it wants, let’s just get into the Christmas spirit.
Once upon a time, I would be caught up in all this, but now I just look at it as the latest one minute wonder until the next thing they think about for us, the public who keep demanding more and more to keep us entertained, albeit short term.
Upside down Christmas trees and an app to buy a Christmas tree were two things I was talking about at the dinner table this weekend with friends. One person said WHY as it made no sense to them.
I can feel no purpose and I can feel no benefit whatsoever.
Holding steady in all this Christmas frenzy week is well worth it as business as usual works. Done the steady stuff now for a decade and I don’t feel like I am missing out at all.
Yesterday (23rd December 2017), I popped into one of my local grocery stores around lunch time and I was shocked at the queues of people, trolleys and baskets everywhere.
What happens at Christmas that we go into this frenzy and think that we have to buy up the whole shop of food and pack up our cupboards with food for the rest of the year?
We seem to forget that the shops are only closed for one day.
Today I was in a cafe with family and we spoke with someone who works there and she was sharing that she used to freeze her leftover Turkey from Christmas and 6 months later it would still be there!
It just shows that we buy in such excess at Christmas time and why?
I used to do the same, so I can most definitely relate.
I have to say now that I am much more content with myself and am not caught up Christmas, I don’t feel that I am missing out at all. I am not going into debt over it, I don’t miss the present buying and giving and I choose to spend the day wisely with family – cleaning.
I was struck yesterday by the waste around Christmas.
In a big Paris department store, there was the most enormous floating ‘candy’ Christmas tree in the central atrium with huge candy balloons floating up and down beside it. It was a massive spectacle and people were crowding in to see it on all floors.
Outside there were ornate Christmas lights strung across all the streets.
People were carrying bag after bag after bag and everything is packaged.
I am wondering what all this decoration and lighting costs and how much of it is really needed.
I am wondering what happens to them all afterwards – do they go in the bin or get reused or recycled?
I am wondering, too, how many of the gifts given are needed and if we could calculate how much gets wasted.
With all the issues in the world right now, including off the chart issues around debt and waste management for the environment, is it time for a review of our spending and waste levels around Christmas time? And to monitor how we are doing year on year.
In the news today (3rd January 2018) is an article that says ‘Divorce day is on its way after Christmas tensions come to a head’ – just another health check as to the value of the way we celebrate Christmas – to the point that we end up with more unrest and relationship issues than before? (http://metro.co.uk/2018/01/03/divorce-day-just-around-corner-festive-break-ups-spike-7199353/)
Also in the news is how this can be the season of ill will where there are more disputes over wills after Christmas.
Whilst relationship issues don’t just arrive at Christmas, as Christmas can be the straw that broke the camel’s back, it is a reflection on the way we have been living in the run up to Christmas, as well as a reflection as to how we are during the Christmas period.
Today is officially Divorce Day (8th January) in UK – http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-42598969 – not only is it based on couples feeling disillusioned about their relationships, but, ‘37%’ of couples say it is financial pressures, and ‘relationships which are already showing cracks are likely to buckle under the added pressure and expense that Christmas brings”.
Whilst relationships as it says may already be under pressure – why is it that we agree to do things e.g. get into financial difficulties, all for a so called ‘special’ time of year e.g. Christmas. Surely the priority is to stay steady, and to feel the truth of everything that is going on around us, and see whether it is true for us – e.g. if something like Christmas puts that much strain on us surely there is a question to be asked as to what is going on? and why is it we subscribe to it – knowing it will put us under pressure?
Just reading in the Metro newspaper yesterday that 60% parents are already suffering from ‘Christmas stress’.
Well what on earth is that I thought?
They have this stress because they are trying to find original places to hide gifts because 40% are convinced that children will find gifts, so some are opting to leave them with grandparents.
The fact that we have a poll of 2000 parents on a topic like this tells me something is not right.
If we read the Stress blog on this website, we can see the harm it causes on our body and it is not to be taken lightly.
https://simplelivingglobal.com/the-real-truth-about-stress/
What I get is that Christmas stress is not needed or necessary and yet we continue to subscribe to things that actually affect us and whether we like to think it does or not, others are effected too. In other words, our behaviours and our movements, actions and whatever choices we make, really do affect us, others and our environment.
If we simply reflected on all that this website is presenting, it would be clear to see our world is in a serious mess right now.
Looking at the bigger picture, why on earth would we want to create a tension in our mind and body associated with Christmas and is it worth it?
I reckon we should all start asking IS IT WORTH IT if our body cops the consequences of our choices.
The Telegraph – 28 November 2018
A well known store has pulled its ‘obsessive Christmas disorder’ range from shelves following complaints it trivialized mental illness.
Products included cake tins and cookie jars with the festive slogan saying “I have Obsessive Christmas Disorder”.
Campaigners warned that the range makes light of an illness which ruins lives and leaves some people feeling suicidal.
750,000 people in the UK suffer from the serious anxiety condition, which is characterised by frequent intrusive and unwelcome obsessional thoughts.
Who comes up with this stuff and how does it end up selling in the shops?
If there was any doubt that they would not sell, suppliers would not bother.
This means there is a supply because we are demanding this type of stuff.
We can understand why campaigners don’t like it but is there more here we need to be discussing.
WHY are we wanting slogans like this and do we think labelling ourselves and calling ourselves ‘obsessive’ is something to be proud of and be identified and recognised for?
What is going on in our minds that gives rise to this type of behaviour that we call obsessive?
Asking pertinent questions and then some more, may just get us re thinking how we are living and what is the purpose.
On that note – what is the purpose of a reindeer and holly in the Christmas colours on a cookie jar with an ill slogan giving us?
We are supposedly thee most intelligent species on earth, so that means we must know why we are subscribing to this on some level.
We want it and we want Christmas to be different every year and give us more – more of what and again what is the purpose?
In my world, Christmas is something I no longer get caught up in and it feels absolutely amazing to hold steady and not feel I have missed anything and just see it as any other day of the year.
The indulgence part is just not there and speaking from lived experience of over a decade, it gets more and more easy as the years pass.
ADD to that no stress, no alcohol and no late nights.
Some may think that is boring and unsociable but not really.
You only have to know me to realise that I live an amazing life and need for nothing.
I am deeply content because I wake up looking forward to every day because I am equipped to deal with whatever life brings. Not perfect but definitely real.
Three weeks left til Christmas and if most of us are honest, how are we feeling?
Are we dreading the –
Drunken ding dongs
Quarrelling kids
Last minute present dashes
Money worries
Cooking disasters
Difficult family dynamics
Christmas lunches
An article in the Daily Mail Weekend magazine – 24 November 2018 writing about a new film on the topic of Christmas, not only covers the above dreaded list, but also says ‘Generally Christmas is a period of high stress and emotion. And when you’re the host you need a whole different skill set of man-management and struggle to keep everyone happy.’
Wy do we create this stress and is it needed?
I feel untouched by Christmas because I no longer subscribe to it. There is no stress or worry here as 25 December 2018 will be the same as any other day.
I heard someone say today that at least Christmas was something to look forward to but is it really if we consider all of the stresses involved?
Are we trying to convince ourselves that Christmas is something to look forward to when if we are really honest deep down inside we are feeling miserable about ourselves and about life?
Is it possible that the festive season are just a few weeks of distraction where we can place our focus on something else rather than any misery we feel inside?
Is that why we say we look forward to it?
Is this new film another distraction so that we can normalise the frenzy of Christmas?
Does it make it all seem normal and acceptable if we watch other people on a screen going through the same thing?
If we accept things as they are, does this mean there is no need to question this Christmas thing further?
Metro News – 6 December 2018
Page 4
Staff at the NHS and in bars, shops and restaurants will be ‘dreading’ the next few weeks because of the level of verbal abuse they face according to a TUC poll of over 4,500 people.
50% of staff have experienced bullying, sexual harassment and violence at work.
The risk of abuse increases during the Christmas party and shopping season.
So WHY is this and what happens at this time of the year that gives rise to this type of ill behaviour that most of us are not even aware of?
What gets into us that give us the licence to do what we want because it’s Christmas season?
Does excess alcohol and indulgence have something to do with our over the top behaviour?
Is abuse something we just tolerate, accept or pretend is not happening on our watch?
ABUSE IS ABUSE and we cannot change that fact.
Do we on some level put up with abuse in daily life and so this is just a bit more because it’s that time of year?
Do we need to look at why bullying takes place and we still do not have much policing or laws about this harmfull act?
Why have we heard over and over again about sexual harassment and violence in the workplace at Christmas and yet the only change seems to be it is on the rise?
Is it time each and every one of us took a reality check and looked at our behaviour in daily life and where the line is where we become irresponsible and think we can get away with harming another?
Any form of abuse needs to stop but do we first need to look at where we are allowing abuse in our life – for example if I allow someone to swear at me and say nothing or laugh it off, in my books that is abuse.
Holding myself and living with the utmost regard and decency has equipped me to ensure that I do not allow abuse and if I feel it, be assured I will speak up.
Without the need for perfection, I have such a deep love and care for myself that abuse in any form towards myself is simply no longer on my radar.
I am certain we can stop abuse but it does need to start with each and everyone of us and one by one we make a difference, if we remain consistent and not fight back or try and change another.
Our living way will turn the tides, that I know and it may take time but it sure is worth it if you ask me.
The Times – 22 December 2018
Parsnip for the road?
Festive food that contains alcohol could send designated drivers to more than twice the legal drink-drive limit at Christmas, according to research. Those who stick to a single drink could still be caught out by the amount of alcohol in modern recipes such as port in cranberry sauce and parsnips with a sherry glaze, the motoring group Inchcape said.
This is quite an eye opener that adding alcohol to food can send drivers over double the legal drink-drive limit.
With an already high consumption of alcohol over the festive period – why are we then adding alcohol to our food?
Do we consider that the alcohol in our food adds to the alcohol level in our body?
What is it about the festive season that we want to numb ourselves to the max with alcohol?
Why do we see this as celebrating?
How is our awareness and reflexes when we have consumed in this way?
How does our body and our concentration feel when we get behind the wheel?
How does this affect our ability to respond to other cars on the road or pedestrians?
Where is our Responsibility when taking to the road, putting our own and other lives at risk?
Is it time to get real and look at why we need alcohol over the Christmas season?
Can there be another way?
The Week – Issue 1205
8 December 2018
20% of people spending Christmas with their families predict they will get “cabin fever” and want to escape after 150 minutes.
Privilege Home Insurance/The Sunday Times
So what is cabin fever?
The feeling of being angry and bored because you have been inside for too long
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/cabin-fever
Interesting how we make Christmas all about family and being together, but does the statistic above show the reality of what is going on behind the scenes of this ‘togetherness’?
Is it possible that many of us find it difficult to be with others and we long for that time when we can escape and be on our own?
What is it that comes up for us when we are with others, especially family members, that makes us feel so uncomfortable?
Yesterday at dinner with friends, we were discussing the fact that there was a lot of traffic on some roads. One friend said that it is likely to be people needing to get away and out of the house and do something like sale shopping, after the tension of Christmas Day.
Is being ‘inside for too long’ the issue, or is it that we are already living with a restlessness within and so being with others and without having access to all of the ways that we might usually escape, just intensifies this?
What if the issue is not with Christmas, or those around us, but the way that we are living every day?
What if Christmas just amplifies everything about our day to day life that is not working?
At an accident & emergency department yesterday, the triage nurse was sharing how busy it was in the main department.
She said the sad thing was that many families take in their elderly family members for Christmas so they can have a peaceful time at home without them.
This is apparently a common thing. It happens every year, across the country.
It had never occurred to me that someone would do that. But it occurs to hundreds of people every year.
And once you think about it, you can see why.
Get the oldies out of the way so you don’t have to care for them or involve them.
Tell yourself they are in good hands.
Maybe you are sick of looking after them.
Maybe you simply can’t be bothered.
What a tragic and disgusting indictment this is on our society and of the word ‘family’.
The Guardian – 5th January 2019
Unhappiest time of the year? Christmas Day divorce petitions.
Over the holiday period from Christmas Eve to New Years Day 455 applications were lodged in England and Wales, the Ministry of Justice said. Statistics showing that 150,000 people have been on digital justice platforms during the past year.
The first full week of the new year is one of the busiest periods for initiating divorces… Why?
Does our behaviour over the Christmas period cause the decline in our relationships?
Why do we make Christmas such a big thing? Do we use it as an excuse to indulge excessively?
What are our expectations of having the best Christmas and expectations of each other?
It seems like Christmas mania to me with the excessive food shopping, present shopping and party going and drinking and not remembering what we did at the last party.
Why do we need to go to these extents putting unnecessary pressure on our relationships?
What is missing in our lives that drives us to these extremes?
Is Christmas to blame for the breakdown in our relationships, or were the cracks there before?
Is it possible connection is what really counts, bringing us together, to just enjoy being with each other.. every day not just at Christmas?
Is it possible this connection starts with a connection with ourselves, so we do not need or want another to do or be anything more than themselves?
The Guardian – 7th December 2019
Supermarkets’ Pet-Friendly Mince Pies Will Round off any Dog’s Dinner
Supermarkets are selling own-brand mince pies for dogs. One supermarket has also launched macaroons for small breed pooches – canine delicacies filled with a dog friendly “yoghurt”. These are promoted as not just handmade but also individually packed.
The products reflect research indicating that the average pet owner will fork out £44 on treats, outfits and toys for their dogs this Christmas – that’s a national outlay of £528 million.
At the same time 92% of those surveyed by Mars Petcare say they will buy their pet a gift because they don’t want them to feel left out.
The move highlights the growing trend of cat and dog owners seeking to buy the same products for their animals as they do for themselves.
Mintel research suggests that 54% of millennial pet owners would rather cut spending on themselves than skimp on their pet, while 38% say they are interested in buying human-style food for their animals.
The pet advent calendar market is also firmly established and is now offered by numerous retailers since the idea was pioneered in the UK five years ago.
One supermarket is also among many retailers to stock alcohol-free mock prosecco for cats – called Pawsecco.
Whether all this seasonal indulgence is a good thing remains moot: it is estimated that 52% of Britain’s pets are overweight.
Let’s get real here – dogs will eat anything and they don’t care what they eat as long as they are eating something, so is it possible that dressing up a treat that is meant for a human to give to dogs is only there to satisfy our need to be loved?
Is it possible that dogs are dogs for a reason and should eat the food that is suitable for them?
Our penchant for – and frankly, desperate – ways of coming up with novel items for people to spend their money on at Christmas, means we are using our pets more and more to get in on the action.
But, of course, the manufacturers are only giving us what we want.
The numbers of overweight pets is shockingly high and, just like humans, if they eat the wrong foods, have too much food and little exercise, they will become overweight – and with that comes all of the illnesses and disease associated with Obesity.
Christmas, for humans, is a time for indulgence and excess.
Is it possible that we are now taking our pets on a very slippery slope to Obesity and illness?
Huge newspaper full page advertising –
This is a “spectacular snow and ice sculpture walk-through experience” in the UK.
Ice artists spent months carving and creating characters from a famous Christmas story using 500 tonnes of Ice and Snow.
To maintain the environment, the setting of -10ºC is telling us the temperature will be very cold.
The official website has tips and that includes pushchairs are welcome.
There are also plenty of other shows to keep us entertained this Christmas.
It seems what we are now seeking is “experience”.
Have we exhausted the buying and shopping and acquiring stuff?
We want to feel something when we go to these places – like minus 10 degrees and the wow factor of things created from ice and snow?
So have we bothered to think about it all or do we just go along with what conveniently suits us?
Firstly, what resources are needed to pull off 500 tonnes of snow and ice which are not magically collected from the mountains, as the country in question does not have snow in abundance to carry out such a mammoth task?
Are any of us seeking this type of experience the ones that bang on about waste, climate change and how humans are destroying our natural world?
Are we thinking about the experience for ourselves, or do we have the well-being and deep care for our child in the pushchair at the forefront, when we enter a minus 10 degrees setting?
Is this all just another eye candy experience that we convince ourselves we need OR is it merely a one-upmanship?
That means we need others to know we did something they have not, so we get one up on them, so to speak.
Maybe it is neither of the above and just something we want to talk about to our friends and family at Christmas time and keep the kids happy.
Or is it simply to upload and post on social media as we know this ice and snow sculpture may still be a new thing for many?
Whatever our reasons for attending, would it be wise to consider the whole impact that something like this has once the festive season is over?
It has to all be disposed of and that requires resources and produces waste.
The waste thing seems to be a big topic right now as we are not able to deal with the waste we are choosing to create in all areas of life.
Once upon a time, these things were for books and our minds were filled with dreams and fantasies. Today that is no longer the case, as we have these entertainment places to visit to capture the magic and we keep creating more and more ways to “experience” things.
So what exactly is missing in our lives that we need this and if it is great and we champion it, do those magical feelings last and if so, how long for?
Does being in very cold conditions actually support our body any way and what if our body could communicate, what would it have to say if we are to be absolutely honest here?
Do all these festive entertainment experiences leave us somehow wanting and seeking the next thing to be even more spectacular, or do we feel settled inside our body?
Questioning WHY and HOW we have got to this point when it comes to Christmas, is well worth pondering on…
The Times – 24th December 2019
Christmas Love Melts Away Like Snow
Dating experts suggest that, like the 12th day of Christmas, new relationships at this time of year simply fade away.
With festive parties coming thick and fast, this is a time of year that many single people find themselves smitten under the mistletoe.
Yet observers of modern romance say that these new loves are often ditched as soon as the celebrations are over in what they have dubbed “snow-globing”.
(Snow-globing – means the person you are dating is using the holiday season to con you into thinking you are more serious than you actually are)
Such Christmas love affairs are over even quicker than those in what they call the “cuffing season” – when single people partner up for a cosy winter together separating in spring.
The chief executive of a dating agency said: “The magic of Christmas proved irresistible to many. Christmas is such a romantic time. If you combine getting tipsy and the twinkly lights, it’s easy to see why many relationships start at this time. There’s Christmas markets and ice-skating. It makes everything seem magical but then the depressing month of January comes around and it’s very difficult to sustain any relationship unless it’s very special.”
An analysis of seasonal patterns for new relationships based on data from a social media site found a 34 per cent jump in changes in status during Christmas.
A behavioural psychologist said that starting a relationship at Christmas was like a holiday romance. She said: “It’s the time when dating websites see the least traffic because people are looking for something less serious.”
When did we get to the point where we started to treat relationships with such irreverence?
Is it possible that we jump into a relationship at Christmas because we are lonely and then realise that it is not the truth, so we bail out?
In fact, that last question could be applied to all year round.
What is it that makes the Christmas period exacerbate the feelings of loneliness in us?
Are we saying that the rest of year we are not that lonely?
It is so easy to blame Christmas or ‘snow-globing’ or the ‘cuffing season’ for our break ups but isn’t it simply a case of us not wanting to take responsibility for our choices?
Is it possible that, once the Christmas period is over and we go back to ‘normal life’, we realise the Christmas fairytale is no longer there and we start to get the real person, which we don’t truly like?
There’s that saying that goes: “a dog is for life not just for Christmas” – do we now need to apply that to Christmas relationships?
ABC News – 26th December 2019
Christmas Event Stampede Injures Several
Five people were taken to hospital after an event billed as the “ultimate mega balloon drop” resulted in a stampede as the crowd raced for the free gifts.
Balloons were filled with gift cards and other prizes and dropped at a shopping centre shortly after midnight.
Several people were knocked off their feet, with injuries sustained included traumatic chest injuries and neck, leg and back pain,
Hundreds of shoppers had attended the event, which was advertised as a promotion to “keep the party going throughout the night.” It happened as part of a 36-hour trading marathon ahead of Christmas.
Retailers expressed surprise over the organisation of the event with staff saying:
“It was pretty insane.
“I think it was a bit over the top. It could have been controlled better.”
“The concept is good, it just could have been managed and policed a bit better.”
What are we doing having this event at midnight?
What are we doing having a 36-hour shopping marathon?
Due to the limited number of balloons, this event caused a frenzy and it was fortunate there were not more serious injuries or even loss of life.
There have been many past videos of human behaviour when there is reduced or free stuff to be had and in many cases we become, let’s just say, not very nice people.
Surely the organisers should have realised the balloons, being so densely packed together in a small area, would result in a push to catch them once they were dropped?
This balloon drop was only going to ever give a select few the prizes that were on offer.
Is it possible the organisers could have given everyone that came through the doors a free prize instead?
Yes, it could have been managed better.
Yes, it could have been controlled and policed better.
Yes, it was a marketing ploy to get as many people in the mall.
And yes, it should never have taken place in the first place.
But how about we forget about all of the above?
Is it possible it happened simply because we are all greedy?
Is it possible the organisers are greedy for creating and allowing this event to take place?
Is it possible the retailers are greedy for going along with this event and having their staff work 36 hours?
Is it possible the staff are greedy for working these extra long hours?
Is it possible the public are greedy for wanting events like this where the chance of a free gift is too much to ignore?
We have FOMO (fear of missing out) and all we want is More, More, More.
Is it possible that we are all Responsible for the creation of this incident?