Dear World,
How many of us are ready to admit we feel empty inside?
How did we get to this point in life where we feel empty?
What makes us feel empty inside at this time of the Year?
What makes us feel so empty inside, like we have a hole?
Why do we seek utter nonsense just to keep that empty feeling out?
Why are we using Social Media to feed our long term empty feelings inside?
Why are we turning to even more TV watching as it makes us forget how empty we feel inside?
Why do we feel super empty after just binge watching our box set of movies throughout the night?
Why must we have all sorts of entertainment to push down the emptiness we feel inside?
Why is it that no matter how much entertainment and food we ingest, we simply cannot shake off that bottomless void of emptiness?
Why do we feel so empty inside after partying all night and taking ‘recreational Drugs’ ?
Why are we so fixated on having a good time as we are convinced it will erase that empty feeling that just keeps coming up?
Why do we wear our ‘fake it till we make it’ costume on, hoping the world and its brothers will not discover how empty we feel?
Why are we using a list of distractions every day to keep away those ugly feelings of emptiness inside?
Why do we find ways to fill up our life, just to forget about that constant empty feeling inside?
Why do we feel so empty inside, soon after our big Birthday bash?
Why do we come back from our Holidays with that empty feeling?
Why do we expect our expensive Holiday to somehow get rid of that empty feeling we have all year round?
Why do we feel extra empty inside soon after the Christmas holiday season is over?
Why do we hate the day after hangover, which started when we had feelings of emptiness inside the day before?
Why do we put all our focus and emphasis on to one event and soon as it’s over, we face that empty feeling inside again?
Why do we use self-medication – aka Lifestyle Choices that are harmfull to stop the empty feeling inside, for just one moment?
Why do we assume that Online Shopping is going to cure our empty feeling inside for the short term?
Why do we wake up on a Monday morning with a sense of emptiness in the pit of our stomach?
Why do we get that empty feeling inside as we leave for work and can’t seem to shake it off and it’s even worse when we get back home?
Why do we feel empty and exhausted, after playing nicey nice at work all week?
Why do we have emptiness inside + anxiety + stress + moods swings?
Why have we developed anxiety because our empty feeling inside is not covering up the cracks we have in our life?
Why do we always do the good thing as being good is what we got told works, but yet it leaves us with that empty feeling inside?
Why does the good life syndrome leave us feeling super empty inside?
Why do we wake up next to a partner pretending we are ok when we feel such a sinking feeling of empty-ness inside of us?
Why do we have a Happy face that pretends to hide the fact that we feel miserable and empty inside most of the time?
Why do we Lie and say life is great when it really sucks because we feel so empty inside?
Why does the empty feeling we hold inside of us affect our moods and we just can’t seem to shake it off?
Why are we always on the lookout to do Crazy stuff as it keeps away that void – the empty feeling inside?
Why does the emptiness inside create such tension and Stress for us?
Why is nothing working as no matter what goes on, that agony of feeling empty inside, just sits there?
Why do super rich people say at the end of their lifetime that they never cracked why they felt so empty inside?
Why do we know that no amount of fame or fortune can cover up the void of emptiness that many feel inside of them?
Why on earth do we feel such chronic feelings of emptiness inside that bring on despair and a kind of numbness?
Why are we always wallowing in our pity pot with this empty feeling inside and never saying or doing anything?
Why has this empty feeling inside that never goes away, given us the licence to withdraw from engaging in life?
Why does feeling empty inside lead to more distance with others and less social Communication?
Why do we feel a sense of loss with this empty feeling inside and no amount of meditation and retreats is cutting it?
Why have we always avoided uncovering what is lying under the empty feeling inside of us?
Why do we end up always self-bashing ourselves because of this thing we feel, that we call emptiness inside?
Why do we Judge ourselves for being empty inside but never Question any further or share with another how we feel?
Why do we get that hollow feeling in the centre of our stomach area when we become aware of the empty feeling?
Why do we feel our life is pointless with no meaning or purpose because we suffer with this incessant empty feeling inside of us?
Why has this empty feeling inside created a false way of living that lacks meaning and purpose?
Why have we become so confused and overwhelmed when we feel that emptiness inside rear its head?
Why are we getting a tightness in our chest area when we realise how empty we are feeling inside?
Why are we struggling to get over a loss and unable to move on in life because of this nagging empty feeling inside?
Why do we feel such a hole inside with this empty feeling and life is not making sense anymore?
Why have we never bothered to even Question this empty feeling inside that we have been living with for decades?
Why does our behaviour change when we clock that empty feeling inside of us that lingers on and on everyday?
Why do we seem to run from this empty feeling inside and escape reality and Real life responsibilities which we hate?
Why do some of us go around in life like a robot, doing things mechanically, like we are empty and dis-connected from the world?
Enough said – there are plenty of Questions thus far presented for us all to consider.
Next – Listen up everyone, we have proper research now, telling us more about this “empty” feeling that many of us have or have had. And we now have the first ever definition of the word ‘emptiness’.
This comes directly from the people – so we could say this is the living science (the body of those people) reporting to us all (humanity).
Keep reading as we could all learn something more here…
Many People Feel Empty – Understanding what it Means
1 July 2021 – Medical Express News
According to this news story, many of us have felt “empty” at some point in our life or perhaps we have heard someone else describe themselves in that way. But while this might be a relatively common feeling, it is often not spoken about as a symptom of mental health difficulties. Typically, “feelings of emptiness” are only considered as a symptom of borderline personality disorder – a mental health condition characterised by challenges with emotions, relationships to others, and feelings of chronic emptiness.
After coming across many people who reported “feeling empty” when accessing mental health services in Scotland, a research team wanted to know more about the feeling, which was rarely mentioned in mental health research. They began asking people they interviewed whether they had felt this way.
This started a 4 year project, which involved listening to the perspectives of more than 400 people. The researchers wanted to shed light on how common it is for people to feel empty, and why it is important for researchers and clinicians to start paying attention to this feeling.
“Our research has allowed us to provide the first ever definition of emptiness based on the descriptions of people who experienced it first-hand. This has not only shown the importance of this feeling, but also makes future research possible”.
400 people aged 18 to 80 who had reported feeling empty at some point in their lives – some rarely and some all the time, described what it was like to feel this way and resulted in hundreds of emotive, first-hand accounts.
Some described feeling empty as being –
“a kind of bottomless jug that can never be filled”
“a feeling of *othering and separation from society”
*Othering – this aspect of emptiness was metaphorically represented in terms of either a barrier (e.g., a fog or veil) or a distance (e.g., a chasm, a gulf) between self and world. (2)
“sucks all of the life and energy out of you”.
“When you feel like everything you do is pointless and you are just going through the motions. Just trying to fill in the time until you die.
Sometimes you have fun or something good happens, which can distract you for a while, but ultimately there is a hollowness inside which never goes away. It is as if you are transparent and anything positive like love or joy just passes right through you, without sticking and afterwards it feels like it was never there at all.”
Others spoke of motivation levels
“at complete zero”, and another said:
“It felt as though I was not fully part of the world, I could not feel anything and nothing I did made an impact on events or other people, I ‘existed’ but I was not ‘alive’.”
Interestingly, half of participants had never struggled with mental health difficulty – showing us that emptiness is not only experienced by people who have received a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, but that it can be experienced by people with and without mental health problems.
The study also identified a strong link between feeling empty often and suicidal thoughts and behaviours, with those who felt empty all of the time more likely to have thoughts about or attempted Suicide.
And, despite never having been given a definition of what was meant by emptiness – and instead asked to speak from their own perspective – hundreds of participants described the same feeling. We found that emptiness was characterised by a sense of inner void, coupled with lack of purpose in life and a sense of disconnection to the people in their lives and the world around them. This left people feeling that they were “going through the motions” and not able to contribute to the world and their lives as they would like.
This research has now resulted in the first definition of Emptiness.
They hope that this will make it easier for clinicians to ask people about emptiness, and for researchers to start investigating this feeling, which has previously been neglected in Conversations about mental health.
Our findings lead us to believe that emptiness is far more widespread than previously recognised.
There is a lot we do not know. For example –
- WHY do people feel empty?
- WHY do some feel more empty than others?
- What can we do about it?
Answering these Questions is likely to have a big impact for many people. Understanding what emptiness is and how it develops. How to support people who feel this way, lives may be made more meaningful and deaths by Suicide prevented. (1)
Dear World – time to wake up
How serious is it to know that the findings from this study are saying that emptiness could be far more widespread than they previously recognised?
This research has been based on people’s personal accounts, which has been published in a scientific journal. This means this is real life stuff and science are endorsing it. Now clinicians can ask their patients about emptiness as it has been officially recognised.
How about we send those researchers back to find out WHY and HOW people dis-connect and dis-engage from life and that means being and relating to all aspects of human life, so we can end this ‘symptom’ of mental health difficulties as stated above?
Then we ask them to carry out studies on those like the author of this article and this website that do not live with an ‘empty feeling inside’ and check out their lifestyle choices and how they engage and connect to all aspects of human life and have a strong sense of purpose that is activated daily.
Understanding the Typical Presentation of Emptiness:
A Study of Lived Experience – 19 May 2021
Introduction
Among the individual diagnostic criteria for borderline personality disorder (BPD) within the DSM-5 (American Psychiatric Association, 2013), chronic sense of emptiness appears to be especially pervasive.
However, feelings of emptiness are also associated with anxiety, Depression and suicidal ideation.
Blasco-Fontecilla et al., 2016; Klonsky, 2008 (2)
As well as being often reported by patients experiencing psychosis.
Federn, 1952; Zandersen & Parnas, 2019 (2)
Reported feelings of emptiness also appear to be especially persistent. Symptom progression of individuals diagnosed with borderline personality disorder was followed for over a decade, finding that the majority of symptoms typically remitted within a period of 8 years, while sense of emptiness was still present after 10 years.
Zanarini et al., 2007 (2)
Qualitative reports also speak of the persistent nature of emptiness as a manifestation of long-term psychological distress present for individuals experiencing a range of mental health difficulties.
Reflecting on own life experiences with schizophrenia, Kean reported that emptiness was a permanent feeling which no drug or therapy was able to relieve.
Kean, 2009
However, in spite of these pervasive and persistent characteristics, and its presence within commonly utilised diagnostic manuals, this sense of emptiness is under researched and poorly understood.
D’Agostino et al., 2020; Miller et al., 2020
Dear World
We can no longer negate the value and importance of “lived experience” because it is relatable to humanity. We, the people created this ill and gathering data first hand by way of Qualitative Research gives us another angle, something that other studies cannot, as they rely heavily on numerical data – not real life, what is going on in a given moment.
Next –
We must ask the Question – WHY is sense of emptiness under researched and poorly understood?
What if we took into account just the previous real life accounts of what the people have to say about how they feel, then join the dots and add a dose of “Keep It Simple”.
In other words, what would your granny have to say with her good old fashion common sense wisdom about this emptiness stuff.
Response from granny:
Mind your own business, stop your nonsense on Screen Time and get to bed early and take responsibility for everything going on in your life. Start cooking proper food and make sure it is simple. Action housework every day and prepare for work and make yourself use-full out there in the Neighbourhood and Community. That means Talk to people, engage with them and support them because you can and without wanting anything in return. See the world as one unit, one Family and that there is no individuality and separation really.
End the virtual reality that you keep escaping to as it brings in an even greater distance which means that empty feeling inside will just get deeper and bigger. And every night as you lay in bed, hand on your chest to feel your body so you know you will wake up connected.
Method
240 participants detailed their experiences of emptiness in a survey.
Inductive thematic analysis was performed to produce a detailed description of emptiness and a definition of its typical manifestation.
178 individuals with lived experience of emptiness rated the accuracy of this definition, in a follow up survey.
Results
9 components of Emptiness were identified.
These were used to produce a definition of the typical manifestation of emptiness, which highlighted a sense of going through life mechanically, purposelessly and numbly, with a psychological and bodily felt inner void, together with a sense of disconnectedness from others and of not contributing to an unchanged distant and remote world.
Participants in the second survey judged this definition as highly accurate.
Hello
What is this definition of typical manifestation of emptiness telling us?
What if we do not have to tick boxes, remove ourselves from those around us, become robots and do things mechanically without engaging in that moment?
In other words, we are not consciously present, so our mind is not with us when our body is carrying out a task.
What if we do not have to go through life without purpose because there is Another Way but it requires us to take FULL responsibility for all the choices we make? That means there are consequences that come with every single choice we make, every single day.
What if we can stop the numbing feeling just by simply applying what granny says with her good old fashion wisdom?
What if the psychological and bodily felt inner void simply goes if we Connect to our body and engage with humanity and that means with people on the streets and in our world everywhere, with no holding back, calculating or coming with a hidden agenda?
What if we stopped the chit chat that bombards us about this and that and just simply GET ON WITH IT and that means get on with life and that includes Cleaning Our Toilet?
What if we made the movements to not sit and scroll our screens or watch the big screen or immerse ourselves in Video Gaming just to live in a virtual world that removes us even further from reality and ensures the emptiness inside continues to grow?
Affective, Agentic and Bodily Self
Emotional life and one’s sense of personal agency and physical body appeared disrupted in our participants. They reported being drained and soulless, experiencing a distressing “feeling of having no feelings.” They felt emotionally numb, unable to cry or laugh, to experience joy or sorrow, with some emphasising the difference between this feeling and those, such as sadness and despair, more commonly associated with low mood or depressive states. Similarly, participants described a lack of felt purpose and meaning in life, with everything appearing pointless. They reported having “nothing valuable to work toward,” being unable to engage with any meaningful activity, “wanting nothing,” and therefore lacking a sense of having a direction in life. This was associated with a sense of “just going through the motions”, or “running on autopilot.” Participants described themselves as automatons carrying out tasks necessary for survival but with little or no conscious connection to these activities. Absence of emotions and purpose were reported as being at the roots of a sense of being empty inside. Participants tried to convey this feeling through analogies and metaphors. They described themselves as being like “a blank page with no way of writing it,” an “empty shell,” a “cover that does not have anything inside,” or a “bottomless jug”, with the latter highlighting that any fleeting emotional experiences would “pass right through,” thereby making it impossible for the inner void to ever be filled. These psychological feelings could be accompanied by uncomfortable sensations (e.g., an ache, a dull pain, a knot, a sense of hollowness) in the body, often within the chest, or central cavities of the body
What if we carried out a Qualitative Research Study with participants of all ages from any country and any background? In other words, this data would show results from all demographics worldwide without selecting any sample population.
They participants are to apply the Simple Living Global Back to Basics Program for 3 months. Those that can read are required to go through the categories on this website that could further support. For example – any sleep issue or fatigue or exhaustion, a must read would be the whole Sleep section, answering the questions with absolute honesty and applying the common sense presentation that is offered in each article.
And finally, the author would record a *’connection exercise’ and explain on the audio where it comes from, why it has worked for thousands around the world and how to apply it as part of a routine and rhythm for daily life.
*this is not filling the mind up or trying to empty the mind meditation
Self and Others
Emptiness was typically experienced with reference to one’s relationship to other people. Firstly, participants felt that they had nothing to give to others. They felt unable to make an impact, to give any real contribution to their personal relationships and communal life. Relatedly, they expressed a sense of worthlessness and a lack of inherent value, and depicted themselves as being a nuisance and a burden to others. Additionally, participants experienced a lack of recognition. They felt as if they were “invisible” to those around them. They felt that they were neither listened to nor noticed by others, including those one cared the most about, that they were a “missing person” despite being surrounded by others. This was associated with the sense of being objectified and expendable (e.g. treated like a “doormat,” a “tool”). Participants also spoke of feeling alone, disconnected, cut off and distant from those around them. In general, components concerning this domain highlight a keenly felt sense of isolation and utter Loneliness, an inability to connect, to join in, to be seen, and to be an integral part of the social world.
Self and External World
Emptiness also concerned a specific way for the self to relate to the external world more generally, including the impersonal world. Participants reported feeling detached, far away from everything, experiencing a sense of “othering”. This aspect of emptiness was metaphorically represented in terms of either a barrier – (e.g., a fog or veil) or a distance (e.g., a chasm, a gulf) between self and world.
The world was described as being the same as always, as retaining its “brightness,” as being a place full of life but no longer as something one could engage with.
However, while being disconnected from the world, the self does not cease to exist.
But this is mere existence.
These identified components were used to create a definition of emptiness representing its prototypical manifestation.
A feeling that one is going through life mechanically, devoid of emotions and purpose, and therefore is empty inside, with emptiness often being bodily felt in the form of discomfort in the chest. This is coupled with feelings that one is disconnected from others, in some way invisible to others and unable to contribute to a world that remains the same but from which one is distant and detached. (2)
Emptiness is a common condition and it is high time we all start to discuss this topic and ask Questions as to why and how we end up with feeling empty inside.
To know we have other fellow humans living on this earth withdrawn, dis-connected, lonely and feeling worthless. This tells us we have an ill that has only just been brought to our awareness.
So how are we going to respond to this call from these people to lift the veil and end the gulf they feel between them and the world, which means ALL of us?
References
Herron, S.J., & Sani, F. (2021 July 1). Many People Feel ‘Empty’ – Understanding What it Means is Important for Improving Our Mental Health. Medical Xpress. Retrieved January 14, 2022 from
https://medicalxpress.com/news/2021-07-people-important-mentalhealth.html
(2) Herron, S.J., & Sani, F. (2021, May 19). Understanding the Typical Presentation of Emptiness: a Study of Lived-Experience. Taylor and Francis Online. Retrieved January 14, 2022 from
https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/09638237.2021.1922645